Day 5 Unreliable Friends!

5. Unreliable Friends:

Teenagers are often highly influenced by their friends. This can please parents and carers if they approve of the behaviour of their friends but can cause problems if parents and carers believe that their teenager is being 'led off-course' by them.

Parents and carers worry that their teen may end up mixing with 'the wrong crowd.'

Some groups of teens can end up with quite a reputation of law-breaking or rowdy behaviour and parents and carers can become very concerned when they discover their teenager hangs-out with them.

It is important to check the facts. When you hear something, how do you know that it is true?

There is nothing worse then confronting your teen only to find out that the rumours were not true and your teen has just been accused by you of doing something that they haven't done.

Once you have the facts it is always helpful to talk to you teen about your concerns. Make sure you choose the right moment to bring up the subject. If you and your teen are feeling calm prior to your conversation you have a far greater chance of an effective communication with them but if either of you are feeling tense or distracted in the first place then the chances of you communicating effectively are slim.

It is best so be honest, to let them know of your concerns and then listen carefully to what they say. If you remain calm when they are speaking and fully listen to them they are more likely to trust you with the truth and then you will be in the best possible situation to decide what action needs to be taken.

Once you have fully listened to your teen it is your turn to let them know your concerns and any action that you have decided to take.

Depending on the reaction of your teen you will be able to decide on the best course of action. Providing you come across to them as fair and reasonable they are likely to respect what you have to say even if they don't actually say so.

Once the lines of communication have been opened regarding your concerns it is important that you continue to offer your teen feedback at the right time and in the right place.

Continue to assess the situation and let your teen know your worries and concerns.

Praise them when they comply with your wishes and follow through with any sanctions that you have agreed if they don't comply.

Teenagers respond well to the certainty that you will follow through with any sanctions you have agreed.

Are they getting in with the 'wrong crowd?'