83. Clothes:
Some teenagers are very interested in
clothes. They spend hours researching the latest trend in magazines
and spend their available money on buying the seasons fashions.
This can be fun and they can get a lot
of satisfaction wearing clothes that suit them but some teenagers
become obsessed by clothes and will not go out unless they are
wearing clothes that they think make them look good. It is important
that your teen learns that there are other things in life that matter
and that while new clothes are nice they should only buy what they
can easily afford. It does not make sense getting into debt in order
to buy new clothes.
It is possible to buy clothes from
charity shops and adapt them to make them look more fashionable. If
your teen is creative they may be able to make their own clothes or
maybe you can make them an outfit?
Making clothes can be fun. Knitting and
sewing are useful skills to develop. Being able to take up a hem or
sew on a button is very helpful. Take the time to show your teen how
to make simple clothing repairs will help them to be more independent
and save money. If they can make minor adjustments on clothes such as
putting up or taking down a hem they will be able to customise clothes
to suit them.
84. Competition:
Some competition in life can be good.
We all get plenty of experience of winning and losing in life and
competing with others can be fun. At other times competition can be
less productive.
We all have our own unique gifts and
talents and there are things that we are not very good at. Some
people seem to specialise in one thing that they are good at and
other people are known as good all-rounders but are not particularly
outstanding at any one thing.
Knowing and celebrating what we are
good at is fun and rewarding but it is also good to work on areas
where we require improvement.
If your teen is quite competitive then
this can be encouraged providing it has a positive effect on them.
Some teenagers become obsessed with competing with their peers and
forget that a lot can be gained through cooperation and collaboration
in place of competition.
Challenging yourself to beat your own
personal best at sport can be very rewarding. If we teach our teens
to strive to be the best that they can be, they are likely to take
pride in their achievements.
Being good at something takes work. It
is good to encourage your teen to work at things in order to improve.
You can model this by learning new
skills yourself. If your teen is able to watch you trying something
new, working to improve and succeeding, this is likely to foster a
good mental attitude in your teen too.
85. Someone To Talk To:
Most of us benefit from having a small
number of people we know that we can confide in. We trust that they
will listen to us, not judge us and that they will not breach our
confidences. If your teen does not have this, they may feel rather
insecure and uncertain in life. Show them that they can trust and
rely on you by listening carefully to them and not judging them.
There is a lot to be gained by both
teen and parents or carers if they can build their relationship to
one of mutual trust and respect.
Encourage your teen to become the kind
of person others will trust and depend on. Being a good listener and
being non-judgemental are positive qualities that we can all work on
and develop. Your teen may know of someone at their school who is
lonely. If they can take time out of their own life to smile and be
friendly to this person they have the capacity to enhance the lives
of those around them and this can only be a good thing.
86. Self Help Groups:
Sometimes your teen may struggle to
feel heard and understood despite your best efforts. While some teens
find it easy to talk about their challenges and anxieties to family
members, others struggle with this and can feel isolated. This can be
particularly true if their friends do not share their fears and
anxieties. Your teen may suffer from a specific problem or issue and
may benefit greatly from joining a self-help group where other people
know what they are going through.
These groups can be extremely effective
at supporting people providing the advice they offer is well balanced
and helpful. A small number of self-help groups can lose perspective
and offer few solutions. In these instances the self help group can
make the situation worse.
There is a lot of on-line self-help
available. This can be extremely helpful for people who do not wish
to travel long distances as help is available at the touch of a
button. There are also phone-lines and email addresses available that
offer support. Many self-help type sites are run by people who
understand what your teen is going through as they have had similar
experiences in their own lives. Some of these sites also offer advice
to friends and family members as it can be very hard if you have a
friend or relation that you would like to help but you just can't
seem to find the right words or the right advice to really help them.
As with anything new, look into self-help groups carefully before getting involved with them to ensure
that they are able to offer the support that is right for you or your
teen.
87. Useful Websites:
Most of us have The Internet available
to us in our homes. This means that we have access to websites that
specialise in just about anything that you can imagine.
A simple search on Google or any other
search engine by putting relevant keywords into your browser and
pressing enter can reveal just about anything you want to know.
With so much available at our
fingertips, our task is to ensure that the information that we are
accessing is up to date and accurate. As with any source of
information we need to make sure that we are confident that what we
are being told is accurate and helpful. This is a very important
skill to pass on to your teen. Just because you read something on a
website it doesn't mean that it is true. Anyone can create a website
and providing the content does not breach international laws the site
can remain on the web available for anyone to access. This can be
wonderful as it means we can all freely share our ideas and news but
this also means that some unscrupulous people can do the same. Remind
your teen to keep themselves safe when using the Internet. If they
are paying for goods via websites then ask them to check that the
site is secure before going ahead.
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